I wrote this in English today. 'Cause Mr. Symmonds told us to rant about something, so I did.
I'm here to rant. I'm here to rant about... things that aren't simple and straight forward.
Complicated things.
Yeah, fuck 'em.
I hate when things are complicated. When you have too much of a good thing.
Or what you see as a good thing. I didn't even freaking want this. I just wanted one to go to, one to make me laugh, one to make make me not feel like crap all the time. And along comes three. One for freaking each.
Typical.
Bloody typical.
And I suspect that when I finally work it all out and get everything in balance, they'll all disappear and get sick of me and leave me with jack shit. Like I had to start with.
And why do they all just want the same thing ANYWAY?!
Like, dude. Why can't we just be, you know buddies?
I'm cool with just being buddies.
Now, just because I dont exactly have the the privilege of carrying out what you had in mind doesnt mean we cant be buddies.
So just chillax.
Chill out.
Take a freaking chillaxative.
But I don't want you all to go away.
Let's just be mates.
HMPH.
So, now I have 3.
Fuck Skippy.
I have 3.
They all "like" me.
One, I'm already really close friends with. And I want to keep it that way. Lets call him B.
The other one always makes me laugh and was kinda-sorta judged in a previous post. You'd remember him as D.
And the last one wants to take me to prom, and who I was going to sneak out with at 2am and go to Maccas with, and who I'm just a little, typically infatuated with. Call him K.
I want him the most.
He's the one I want most, if I should be right to want ANY of them.
But, I don't think I have the right.
Because I already told D that I couldnt, and to just wait. I think it would be a little cruel and hypocritical to just end up going out with the next guy who asks after him. Dont you think?
And my friend tells me that I act like Im attracted to B. But I'm not, not in that way. I just want to be his friend. Making him a CD don't mean I like him. It means I want to share my musical interests with him.
But K. I dont know how to feel about this one. He is just SO lovely. It's just straightforward with him. I dont have to try to keep up a conversation. I find myself looking out for him in the hallway. And he gives the biggest motherfucking hugs ever. Like, he basically just carries me off of the ground every time.
Oh, and HE TALKED TO MY FUCKING DAD. Yesterday, at the Track Meet.
He was threatening to do it. He said " OOOO I CANT WAIT TILL MONDAY,
IMA GET UP ALL UP ON U TOO, AHAHAHA.
CANT WAIT FOR UR DAD TO SEE US, JUST TELL ME WHO HE IS EARLIER, SO I CAN INTRODUCE MYSELF"
I thought he was bluffing, but on Monday, I kindly reminded him that if he goes anywhere near my dad I would cut him with a blunt knife. And he said something like "I don't know man, He looks kind of scary. I dont know if I should. Ahhh the daredevil inside of me" and he just looked at me all amused, and I kinda sorta glared back at him.
I didnt think he would.
But right before my race, I was stretching, and I looked over to where my parents were and he was just standing there, casually conversing with them.
I got so mad, I swear.
It was right before my race too, so I guess I kinda got stressed and I blame him for me coming 2nd.
haha.
But he said he was just telling them how cute Zac was.
Oh yup.
I dont even want to know, as long as my papa doesnt say anything.
He's a senior.
He's going to UNLV.
He moved here from New York.
He..
I dont know...
I should stop now.
I'm beginning to get sick of myself.
*eurgh
I sound so typical.
FUCK.
I should be grateful, yeah?
ina